Shinto fertility festivals held annually in Japan are penis-venerating celebrations that involve phallic processions and penis parades. Japan hosts a number of unusual and notorious festivals including the Kanamara Matsuri and the Hōnen Matsuri. While the main event at a penis festival usually involves the parading of a long phallus carved from Japanese wood, this post presents to you the festival foreplay, a top list of penis festival souvenirs.

1. Penis Festival Groucho Glasses

Number 1 on the list are novelty disguise Groucho Marx glasses that have the nose substituted with a penis.

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A while back I posted about Japan’s Resolution To Declining Birth Rate where the image of humping cows was being advertised as a savior to Japan’s low fertility rate and the answer to their population problem.

However, according to the image below, could the declining birth rate just be that they are doing it wrong?

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