LLP » naughty

Absolute Slave

reesan — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 11:51:39 +0000

Apparently the Kanji on the sign says “Zettai Reizoku” 「絶対隷属」 meaning absolute slave or absolute subordination. Not sure where the face-hole sign board originates from or even what it is advertising as it is not as direct as the picture of that arsehole/asshole (depending on where you’re from) featured on hamedori (a Japanese term describing filming or photography of sexual activity from a first-person point of view).

What face-hole would you choose? Dominance or submission?

LLP.

The Upskirt Judo Guy

reesan — Sat, 18 Jun 2011 11:12:09 +0000

“O-Nep!” was a late night comedy show by the Japanese comedy trio Neptune featuring Taizo Harada, Ken Horiuchi (aka Horiken) and Jun Nagura. The trio name comes from the Kinnikuman character, Neptuneman. The show had a segment called “Your wish will be fulfilled! The travelling Nepu throw” which I like to affectionately refer to as “The Upskirt Judo Guy” because that just about sums it up.

The way that the segment broke down was Taizo Harada would dress in wrestling gear usually in a public location with a lot of young, female spectators. He would run into the crowd, grab a mini-skirt wearing female, and perform a tomoe-nage judo throw, flipping the girl over his head and onto a wrestling mat, exposing her underwear with a cameraman conveniently poised to zoom in on the girls panchira. If by an unfortunate accident there was no glimpse of underwear for the audience to view, not to worry. In this rare instance they send another from the trio who pries the girls legs until satisfactory exposure has been achieved for the camera.

Refer to the following embedded video for a few highlights of the show. This show was apparently taken off air because one of the girls that the The Upskirt Judo Guy flipped wasn’t wearing any underwear. The second embedded video shows the footage of this incident.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Qvnn63s-0s

www.youtube.com/watch?v=fU8_Yid1D2s

LLP.

Donut Punchers

reesan — Sun, 22 May 2011 11:31:11 +0000

Love hotels are a short-stay hotel found in Japan that are designed for sex and are renowned for their focus on the privacy of their customers by providing anonymity to those seeking to engage in discrete intimate liaisons. Not the love hotel Banana & Donut (バナナとドーナツ) it seems. This Kyushu-based romance hotel, whose logo is a symbolism of sexual representation depicting an over-exerting banana on the verge of penetrating a coy looking donut, brazenly advertises on billboard-style highway signage this union of the phallus and yoni. They might as well have a big neon flashing sign saying “people getting laid here”. And what do you tell a car full of kids when driving past? Hey look children, this is how Mister Donut make those yummy banana donuts! But Mister Donut doesn’t push the banana in too far otherwise it will turn into a Krispy Kreme.

LLP.

Horny Care

reesan — Fri, 15 Apr 2011 19:21:08 +0000

Looking through the frosted glass there seems to be some curtain dividers so presumably this is a massage joint of some sorts. At first I thought it was a drug store (aka chemist) so guessed that the “horny care” was for prophylactics (like condoms and other preventative devices) or that the store flogged drugs to treat erectile dysfunction, like Viagra. I guess it is a one-stop massage shop, full service offering complete with happy ending? Reminds me of the scene from Full Metal Jacket where a scantily dressed prostitute approaches Joker and Rafter Man at a street corner in Vietnam. She is memorable for the phrases, “Me love you long time”, “Me so horny”, and “Me sucky sucky”, which were later sampled by 2 Live Crew in their song, “Me So Horny” and in Sir Mix-a-Lot’s “Baby Got Back”.

What can I get for ten dollars? Every t’ing you want.

Da Nang Hooker: Well, baby, me so horny. Me so horny. Me love you long time. Me sucky sucky.
[later in the same dialog exchange]
Private Joker: What can I get for ten dollars?
Da Nang Hooker: Every t’ing you want.
Private Joker: Everything?
Da Nang Hooker: Every t’ing.

LLP.

Beef Curtain Bento

reesan — Thu, 14 Apr 2011 11:38:38 +0000

A Yonic Bento perhaps? “Yonic”, the antonym of “Phallic”, is a representation in the shape of a vulva or a vagina. Although the Japanese seem to be big on honouring the phallus in festivals, I hope that their yoni are not relegated to the bento box – although in Okinawa they have a field of dreams dedicated to it. For a few other yonic representations check out Nate Jensen (aka The Deer Humper) fondling some yonic onion rings or Pikachu being violated. Reminds me of the slogan for the Professional Association of Muff Divers: “No Sea Too Rough, No Muff Too Tough”.

LLP.

Lolita, I Am Your Father

reesan — Fri, 05 Nov 2010 11:12:14 +0000

Darth Vader hits Japan again and gets cosy at a penis matsuri with a lolita maid.

Reminds me of the top 7 “Star Wars” euphemisms for masturbation:

7. Grooming the Wookie
6. Polishing Vader’s Helmet
5. Lightsaber Practice with Captain Solo
4. Unsheathing the Meatsaber
3. Performing the Jedi Hand Trick
2. Scratching Yoda Behind the Ears
1. Test Firing the Death Star

Darth Vader corrects some penis graffiti on the Death Star.

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Manko Park

reesan — Fri, 29 Oct 2010 10:25:05 +0000

Left turn up ahead for the chikan field of dreams?

Manko is a mangrove wetland located in Naha and Tomigusuku cities on Okinawa. Manko is also a vulgar, taboo, slang Japanese word for vagina equivalent in English to the word ‘c*nt’.

LLP.

I Love Oppai

reesan — Wed, 27 Oct 2010 10:14:56 +0000

Oppai Seijin’s from all over the world can now proudly advertise their obsession for breasts with this t-shirt available from Don Quixote. The t-shirt says “I Love Oppai” (‘Oppai’, おっぱい translates as ‘breasts’) and who doesn’t love breasts? Geoffropuff stylishly models this impressive number below. Big up to Geoffropuff! Check out his post for full context on how he ended up wearing this classy number.

LLP.

Hamedori

reesan — Sun, 03 Oct 2010 09:39:06 +0000

An interesting promotional display for the Japanese movie ‘Hamedori’ (ハメどり). Hamedori is a Japanese term describing filming or photography of sexual activity from a first-person point of view.

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Japan, You’re Doing It Wrong

reesan — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 10:36:11 +0000

A while back I posted about Japan’s Resolution To Declining Birth Rate where the image of humping cows was being advertised as a savior to Japan’s low fertility rate and the answer to their population problem.

However, according to the image below, could the declining birth rate just be that they are doing it wrong?

LLP.